Breathing in happiness... your happiness...

I used to smile.

Sometimes I noticed myself still smiling and the instant I realize I am smiling I stop myself from smiling because I do not like to smile or find no reason to be smiling.

A lot happens in life. People that have gone through it enough have the resolution of what is described in the human language as being heartless.

Being neutral... thats different.

Even in the difference, you can be around people and enjoy their company or play stupid enough that your attitude blends with theirs or clashes enough that it seems you have an emotion when really you are observing there; wether its through you or in front of you.

Is it odd to notice? When something takes away your smile?

The brief moment of happiness you get when everything is amiss?

The blissful 5 seconds of waking up then realizing... you woke up.

There are... people... that like to have you around, it might even be you or something in you, maybe a spirit, an ancestor, a god... God? The devil? If its just you then it could be the idea of your inner reflection... either way; a thought passes and suddenly, it takes away your upside down frown. Maybe you were frowning the whole time and smiling in secret over something your darkness had you to be smiling for.

A breath of fresh air as some people have been called. Aren't you one?

When you smile, is it a contagious thing? Do people around you smile because you smile or because they feel like smiling? To what extent are they just copying you?

I can feel it. If a broken or heartless person feels nothing as you or i or they or whoever may claim, then they had to rip it out of themselves or have it broken for a reason. You'll remember... regardless of who you are, you'll remember what it was like to smile, but this isn't about that. It about noticing what takes away your smile.

Is the moment fleeting? Are you holding on? Is it over?

Some people will capture a moment with their eyes. Nostalgics and what-not to what you can remember with the scents of an antique book or a comfortable basement, the view of the sea or a particular taste of food.

Do you notice when you swallow your favorite food? I mean really notice? Do you smile all the way through eating your favorite meal or are you just eating?

Is someone or something breathing in your smile?

I may not have many friend, but to what breathes through me at times... I notice I am not the one breathing. I smile and my smile is inhaled siphoning the percentage of smile I've smiled and like a separation in time split among the paradigms of the moments in-between, after and predicted to say "Here is your share of air, angel that should've died a long time ago." Then theres the idea of some not getting any air whatsoever.

That should explain it... I supposed I just wanted you to know.

So keep smiling? Even if it hurts and even if it kills you a little inside?

(:

And... remember to breathe... its your smile, not theirs.