5 October's ago
Last fall was fun.
I'm still trying to see myself as a real person.
With every cell being its own on my body I fear each day something else or spirit, light, something claims the body and melds into who I am or who it remembers I was or it wants me to be so I can't be me. I was happy then I became sad, then I yelled, now I don't want to want but I feel I'm being forced not to want. Is it bad to desire or do people not know even what they desire.
Even be, this fall of 2025 I missed out on much but I saw a night where leaves fell, they were brown and the night was as if I lived on the corner of a light post where the woods and small down were just a skip away.
I today went and saw the leaves dance in the wind; november but october is when I wanted to see the leaves before they fell. I also made jasmine tea noodle. 3 portions of noodle, vietnamese and don't use too much oil. also I used too much fish. However, It was enjoyable an refreshing testing out the aesthetica's and noticing new valynths.
