I... used to be an evangelist.

Speaking everywhere– or... at least trying.

Door to door,

on the street,

churches to my beliefs and thoughts.

wherever I could and really hard too, untaught to full and still figuring it out.

It felt not because force now knowing part and part but because of me wanting too...

Thats not the point though.

I remember going to an apartment house one day doing my best to go house to house in a familiar neighborhood and talking about Jesus and whatnot to my extended of what I could believe in what people only gave me the starter kit and not the "Hey, I get it."

No sales pitch just, "Hey, I'm a kid; I feel I want to tell you something I can't exactly explain."

Not even fully on biblicallicals, also metaphysics twhat I wouldth.

I remember, this man to open the door and his demeanor was of the given uppaence. (e)

He had 2 daughters and a wife and they sat there watching TV.

There was that blue light coming off the TV like when you see those–

and i was just pushing it like okay, okay, thats okay, but can you keep going– or whatever an 18 year old stupid to the world would say?

Maybe not stupid but dumb at coordination of the body to what words can be interpreted to be spoken through the mouth.

...and I did it with a smile on my face not knowing how hard being an adult is.

I'm embarrassed to have not the empathetic knowledge to handle the situation with more grace to know that at some point you don't give up but it is taken from you.

The up...

At some point you feel picking up a guitar is worth nothing,.

I may not be able to explain that amazingly... but there comes a point you feel something just isn't worth it... like trying...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXQh-X5lzEw